The Body of a Mother

As a woman I've encountered body shaming my entire life. I've suffered low self esteem and even have Body Dysmorphic Disorder where my mind thinks there are thinks wrong with my skin, my weight, my hair and basically everything in between. Things only I can see that other's cant. Even at a very tiny 98 pounds at age 20, right before I had my daughter I hated my body and my weight. My thighs were big because they were muscular from walking and dancing every single day. My butt was round and perky and also muscular and I thought I had a big butt that I just wanted to get rid of it. Oh if only I knew then what I know now.

Those muscular thighs and rear end that only a massive amount of squats could produce. The kind that you see on models in yoga pants. The kind that almost look fake because they are so perfect. If only I wouldn't have taken those for granted. 

Now, a mother of two, those things don't exist anymore. My breasts are bigger than they were then, but breastfeeding has made them not so perky anymore. Same with the rear end. The muscular thighs are now thicker and with less muscle. My stomach is flat...until I sit down or lean over. That's the mommy pouch that only a tummy tuck is going to fix and my Diastasis Recti, which is a separation of abdominal muscles from carrying and birthing two children. My body is emblazoned with stretch marks. Tiger stripes, most mom's call them. A badge of honor.

I've proudly lost weight not once, but three times. Each time that I had my kids and then again recently. I enjoy fitness and eating healthy. But you know what? Even through all those triumphs, I am the victim of body shaming. We all are at some point in time and it's sad that we as humans (mothers, those not mothers, men, children, and women alike) have to face those kinds of critiques about ourselves. 

As a reviewer, I test out many products. Summertime brings a lot of requests to review swimsuits. Something I have never been confident enough to wear even when I was a tiny 98lb adult out on my own. Through the years I've learned to push my insecurities aside and silence my BDD and even though it still takes everything in me to agree to review these products, I go ahead and do it. Recently, I reviewed a bikini that I actually do like. I posted photos with my review and not too long after that, I discovered that someone decided to stalk my social media and Amazon profile and body shame me and make fun of my stretch marks, mommy tummy, and basically everything else that being a mother has done to my once fit body.

This same person (who is now known by a different blog name), shames women constantly (looks, weight, personal life, mental health, sexual assault), and proceeds to talk highly of herself afterwards. This seems to be repetitive behavior from these types of people, and it needs to be stopped. 

I am going to be blunt here.

This is the body of a mother.

A body that produced, grew, nurtured, and birthed two human beings. 

This is the body of a mother who eats healthy, stays active, drinks only water (with the exception of my morning coffee and on occasion unsweetened tea). 

This is the body of a mother who only weighs 127 pounds. That's right, ONE -TWENTY-SEVEN.

While that's not the 98 pounds I started out at, I'm a mother. It's unrealistic to think that weight is normal and for my height, that's an unhealthy weight. 

I am not fat. This is what having children does to your body. Maybe some people who judge can't have children, and I'm sorry they can't, but body shaming those of us who have had children is a disgusting way to show how insecure they are. 

Even former Playboy model Kendra Wilson has the body of a mother:

No one forces you to look. No one forces you to look at and read my Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, Blog, Facebook and even more psychotic: my Amazon profile! If you don't like seeing what a REAL mother looks like, don't look at us. Don't look at any of us. We all have "imperfections", but those imperfections produced our sweet, innocent, cuddle bugs that we hold in our arms and kiss goodnight every single night. They produced little versions of ourselves; little pieces of our hearts that are walking around outside our bodies and that we love more than life itself. 

Look up "Real Post Baby Body" on Google. Look through the images. That's what real mothers look like. That's what proud mother's look like. That's the body of a mother.